The Shadow of the Single Life

After returning from the first quarter of my whirlwind tour, I had an interesting conversation with my sister Arielle about the shadow of the single life.
In most of my programs and courses, there are many single women and men who are waiting, yearning, and hungry for love. They protest that they are doing everything. They say they've tried it all. But when I confront them and ask them about their actual plan, what they've studied, what they know about creating a partner; when I ask them about their vision boards or what their everyday life would look like with a partner; when I ask them what their needs are in a relationship, more often than not, I hear a half-answer. I hear the hunger of somebody trying to get a need met or I hear somebody who is attached to the ego ideal of what it would be like to be in love or to have a partner to soothe their loneliness and be their companion. None of that is wrong at all. Thank god we have unmet needs and have that longing, or many people would never even look.
I had the privilege of watching my sister Arielle, who at 44 years old made a plan and stayed committed to that plan each and every day. I watched her feng shui her house, continuallly work on her vision board, create a mandala of love. I watched her open her heart and take on forgiveness, letting go of the relationships that hadn't worked or caused mistrust inside of her. I witnessed what somebody who is fully committed does and is willing to do to open up to having a lover, a companion, a soulmate, a partner, and a spouse.
So the shadow of the single life is a deep resignation, a belief that says "It can't really happen for me" or "It won't happen to me." The shadow of the single life is the shadow of too many relationships gone bad. The shadow of the single life is made up of mistrust or not feeling worthy, maybe because of body image issues ("If only I lose ten pounds..." or "When I get in shape then I'll be loveable.") The shadow of the single life will continue to loom over those who are looking for love unless they make a plan, explore what keeps them single, and step into certainty about the possibility of love.
So for those of you who are ready to break free from the shadow, get out of the prison of the past, and open up to the lover of your life, I suggest that for a guide and teacher, you take it from someone who did it so beautifully and has created one of the most divine marriages I've ever witnessed in my life. Let Arielle share her secrets with you in her fabulous new Soulmate Kit. This "soulmate-in-a-box" kit is jam-packed with DVDs, CDs and her best-selling book The Soulmate Secret. When I asked Arielle recently, "Does The Soulmate Secret really work?" (which, of course, I already knew the answer to), she flooded me with one extraordinary story after another. One of those stories could be yours.

With love and blessings,
Debbie Ford