Your Angelic Self or Your Evil Twin?

Welcome to The Light & The Dark, a newsletter that finally speaks for both our angelic self and our evil twin within (smile).

As you might be aware of, your unclaimed shadows lurk in your unconscious and tell you what you can and cannot do, what you should eat, when you should or shouldn't exercise even if you said you were going to do the exact opposite, how much money you can make or save, or how fulfilling your career can be. Your shadow tells you how much success you can experience and how much joy, happiness and fun you can have or not have each day. But you don't have to tolerate this anymore. Today's the day to say no more, no mas, nie wieder, aldrig mere, finissez-en!

Assuming you're an adult who is making the choices each day that shape your human experience, you can ask, "Why would I let my unconscious rule my life and dictate my future? Why would I hand my life and future over to outdated beliefs, concepts and traumas of the past?" Why? Let me shed some light. Because unknowingly you have let your unconscious rule your life. So let's get honest. Have you fallen asleep at the wheel and forgotten that you are a magnet for repetitive and familiar experiences even if they are ones that you don't want to have? Have you forgotten that there are many layers to the human life and that there is always something greater going on here? When you are asleep, you don't even realize that there is something that has grabbed the steering wheel of your life and is driving you down the same old bumpy, pothole-filled roads that you loathe.

This is why you need to deal with your shadow. This is why you need to make sure you are awake and in the presence of your goals, dreams, desires, wants and unmet needs. When you are awake, you will have the power to choose your path.

Your Weekly Shadow Work

Make a list of your repetive patterns and begin to explore what demons are driving you.
How long have they been in the driver's seat? How much longer will you give them the wheel?
Decide now to push them into the passenger's seat. Today, make a commitment to be a responsible adult and take a radical action NOW.


Once you have shined the light on your darkness, you can powerfully use your voice and feel worthy of receiving all that the universe is waiting to deliver to you. The time is now. The Shadow Effect is coming...to support you Friday June 26th.

With love and blessings,


Debbie Ford

The Countdown is On!

On June 26th, over 5 million people will find out about The Shadow Effect, featuring Deepak Chopra, Marianne Williamson, James Van Praagh, and more.
Be one of the first to experience the movie everyone is talking about and the trailer that will thrill you. Watch the trailer. (http://www.theshadoweffect.com)

Come to a Shadow Salon (http://secure.theshadoweffect.com/index.php?p=Screenings), an exclusive screening hosted by one of my Integrative Coaches, an evening of transformation and shadow tricks. Or host a screening of your very own (http://secure.theshadoweffect.com/index.php?p=Host).

Experience The Shadow Process
Unravel the mystery of your life, coming to:

Naas-Bikfayah, Lebanon
July 24-26, 2009

Fort Lauderdale, Florida
October 23-25, 2009

Register today go to: http://www.debbieford.com/index.php?p=Workshops&a=1018

Ego Management

Sometimes I feel like I'm in the ego management business -- in the midst of finishing a new book, preparing to launch The Shadow Effect, building two new websites, creating an amazing webspace for my coaches, leading workshops and trainings, making brochures, Twittering and updating my Facebook status, mothering, and more. It can be overwhelming and bring up the most earthly behaviors -- mine and others. Of course, I'm in denial when they're mine and appalled when they're somebody else's. That's the way of the ego, the way of the shadow and its mighty defense called projection.

I woke up this morning asking, "What's the answer?" How do you get through life each day when you're in overwhelm, when there is more on your plate than you can handle, or when life is just not behaving as it should? I needed some solace (peace) so I went digging around in my next book The 21-Day Consciousness Cleanse to find it. I thought I'd attend one of my own lectures. And right there on page 12, I got relief. Even though the book is not out until September, I wanted to share what shifted me with you.

It is your soul's journey to bring into balance all of what you are -- the coexistence of opposites, the divine integration of the sum of all the parts. It is the soul's journey to enroll the ego in the quest for the ultimate victory -- the evolution of your own individual consciousness. But the journey must begin by choosing between two forces: one has the power to lead you to new heights; the other can keep you pinned down to a past that is filled with limitation and dread. Don't be fooled. You're living either an ego-driven life or one that is soul centered.

The soul discerns with a laserlike sharpness. The ego judges and rejects with disdain and aggressiveness. The soul takes responsibility.The ego blames and transfers responsibility. The soul moves through life with grace. The ego moves through life with sloppiness, chaos, and drama. The soul feels good about who it is and what it wants and needs to sustain itself, to grow and evolve. The ego never has enough; it can never leave well enough alone or see beyond the current circumstances. It is entitled, confused and feels stuck.

The ego is tirelessly swimming against the current, while the soul sits back and floats in the direction that life is moving in. You're either being guided by your soul or driven by your ego. At any time, you have access to either of these lifestyles, and to all the experiences and emotions they bring with them.

So after reading these short paragraphs, I realized that all there was for me to do in the midst of the turmoil was to choose the journey of my sweet soul -- to tune in, to listen even more deeply and to stay committed to a higher vibration -- the vibration of love, peace and success...my soul's success.

So of course I'll ask you like I asked myself, "What can you do this week to make this human experience more loving, more honest and more soulful?" I hope you remember that, in the midst of an ego attack, you too can choose a higher vibration. It is the only true path to your soul's success.

Sending you lots of love for the week ahead,

 

Debbie Ford

Have You Forgotten?

Have you forgotten who you are, that you were born a child of God, a divine hand, a piece of a giant collective heart that lives to love and loves to live?

Have you forgotten that you matter, that you are infused with a divine power and, because of this gift, you are powerful beyond measure?

Have you forgotten that when loneliness, struggle, fear and limitation are present, they are nothing but states of consciousness that are just an illusion, an intermittent interference, a smokescreen hiding the true essence of who you are?

Have you forgotten that you deserve better, that there is no one in the world quite like you and that without you, our collective heart cannot be whole or healed?

Have you forgotten that peace begins when you have claimed your piece and your place in our collective family? This is all that you are here to do.

Have you forgotten that we were all created equal and that it is our birthright to be treated that way?

Just for today, live like it is your piece that the world needs and is waiting for. Watch, as you step into this truth, how the universe opens up its arms to you. Watch as the world shifts right in front of your eyes and how your essence turns back into a part of the divine herself. Do it for no other reason than to bring a little more peace and EQUALITY to the world today. Do it so that you remember the great gift of life - which is YOU. And in doing so, you will remind others - through reflection - the great gift that they are to this world.

Remember YOU are the love WE are waiting for.

With love and deep gratitude for allowing me to share my piece with you,

Debbie Ford

 

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Go on a 3-Minute Voyage to Remember Who You Are

Watch the cruise trailer to get a sneak peek at a mystical process that will heal your heart and nourish your soul. Space is limited and cabins are running out, so register now! Watch the trailer (www.debbieford.com) and register today.

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Stay Connected

And make sure to stay in touch with Debbie every day by becoming her friend and her fan on Facebook. And on Twitter, follow her at @Debbie_Ford.

Remember Who You Are By Seeing Debbie Live

Celebrate Your Life

June 5th-7th

Chicago, Illinois

http://debbieford.com/index.php?p=Calendar

The Power Of Your Light

weekend workshop

June 19th-21st

Rhinebeck, New York

http://debbieford.com/index.php?p=Calendar

Make sure to tell your friends in the Chicago and New York areas that Debbie is coming to town.

Remember Who You Are by Reading An Incredible Book

Ignite your courage to make that change you've always dreamed of or navigate a tough change that's come your way. Get the book (www.debbieford.com).

Copyright 2009, Debbie Ford. All rights reserved. P.O. Box 8064 San Diego, CA 92038 (800) 655-4016

Anything's Possible When There's No Unfinished Business

For nine years, I have been leading Shadow Process workshops and training programs around the world with amazing people. I've met thousands of people who picked up one of my books, came to one of my workshops, or enrolled in one of my training programs because there was some area of their lives where they wanted to have a massive breakthrough, a shift, a new opening, and a reinvention of a new future. What continually blows my mind is that they get it! They get it by claiming parts of themselves, cleaning up all areas of their life, and saying "I'm sorry, please forgive me, I forgive you." They get it by making integrity lists, cleaning out their closets, tying up loose ends, confronting their addictions or bad behaviors and then doing whatever is necessary to transcend it. They get it by finding the gifts of their past and the wisdom in their wounds. They are able to produce a future completely unlike their past.

I think I am so passionate about this capacity for transformation not only because it reveals the magnificence of our human design but because it is my own story as well -- the story of a girl who found herself loaded with drugs and limitations and with a not-so-promising future ahead of her. But through the process of transforming and growing, that girl came to understand that we are here for a greater reason, that you can't move on until you've cleaned up the past and worked on your unfinished business, and that until you do, life will seem like a repetitive loop of longing, wanting, aching, and hurting.

So, like every day, today is the day for a new future and a new possibility. I offer this to you with an open heart and the utter certainty that you can be more than you ever desired.

There's so much more to say about unfinished business. James Van Praagh, my very good friend and spiritual medium who is in my soon-to-be-released documentary The Shadow Effect, has written an amazing new book on the subject. He offers lessons for the living by sharing the personal regrets, misgivings, remorse, and, most important, the advice from beyond. In this moving book, he demonstrates why it's imperative that we continue to do this work. Read this book to get a new perspective on life and your relationships with yourself and others. 

With love and blessings,

Debbie Ford

 

p.s. Explore how you can create permanent and lasting change and transformation in your own life by coming to a special community call with my senior staff on Monday, May 25th at 5:30 PM Pacific. Dial into the global virtual classroom at 712-338-8000 code 5091#.

The Dark Truth About Our Pain

For the last few weeks, I have been on a radio tour for the release of the paperback edition of Why Good People Do Bad Things. In my interviews, I keep hearing the same questions. Why did you write this as your sixth book? Why is this important to understand? Why do we do bad things? Why do we continue to self-sabotage, making choices that leave us feeling bad about ourselves? It seems like everyone is fascinated but few truly want to chat about the answer -- the solution and the spiritual antidotes that promise spiritual healing and a new unimaginable future. Fear will always win out until we are truly ready for higher levels of understanding and root ourselves in that understanding. If you were listening to one of those radio interviews, this is what I would say once again -- this is the end of the book and the answer to how to stop being your own worst enemy.

The power we all yearn for is the Power of God. God is the only real power, the only real source of long term pleasure, happiness, joy and fulfillment. All other forms of happiness that come from outside of ourselves can be ripped away in a matter of moments. A child you love dies. A con artist gambles your money away and your hard-earned savings evaporate in days. You go in for what you believe to be a regular yearly examination and you find out that you have severe heart disease or cancer. Or you find out that the person you have given your heart to is cheating on you. The list goes on and on of what you or I will have to deal with in this lifetime.

So you ask, who can I trust? How can I stay safe? What do I do? The answer is simple and although it is often distorted in its delivery, it is timeless. The only true safety is in spiritual wisdom and divine connection. If you have a profound, real and tangible experience of the inner resource that has the power to lift you above the pain, suffering and drama of a human life, you will be delivered to the Holy Land, the land of milk and honey, the land of hope, peace and understanding, the place where you will find safety and protection -- the kind of safety that allows you to bust through old patterns, take gigantic risks and learn to love and trust again, the kind of safety that allows you to walk through life with a level of certainty that you were never and will never be alone.

Could today be the day to take back any power you have given to the outer world and recommit to hold, love, respect and nurture your inner world? Today is the day that you can love yourself up so much that you remember that the answers are within and with the power and the force of God, Spirit, love (or whatever you call it) at your side, you can and will make the right choices that will deliver you a life that you LOVE. Pray, chant, contemplate, read, shift, love, love some more and open the door to your holy heart -- it is here that you will find everything you have been waiting for.

This is the only real reason I wrote Why Good People Do Bad Things -- so everyone on the planet who reads my book will see how the split inside leaves us feeling isolated, out of control and resigned to our own negative shadow patterns. I wrote the book so people could uncover the war within themselves and rediscover the simple spiritual practices that can turn us into whole, thriving, impassioned human beings and into our own best friends.

With love and blessings,

Debbie Ford

The Dark Side of People Pleasers

After basking in the light for so many months while writing The 21-Day Consciousness Cleanse, I decided to dip back into the dark side to shed some light on one of the toughest masks that must get broken if we are to break free from the wounded ego's grip. In my last book, which has been released this month in paperback, I explore the masks that we wear that keep us from being authentic and standing in our power. For the next few weeks, I will share some of these masks so that you can explore some of the behaviors that might seem nice, good, even royal but that ultimately undermine our happiness and success. So buckle up because they are straight to the point, no holds barred and meant to pierce the denial that keeps us trapped in our human personas.

People Pleasers are one of my favorite types because, even though this behavior is often rooted in sheer selfishness, people pleasers are actually good down to their core, and their need to please others generally helps someone else. True People Pleasers are usually people who were wounded in adolescence -- shamed until their needs no longer seemed important to them -- and learned at a young age that to survive with the least amount of stress thrown at them, they should try with all their might to make others happy. People Pleasers are prey for the predator types and feel deeply ashamed that they are just not always worth the space they take up in the world. Their feelings of unworthiness, and the fear that they are nothing without someone else's love or approval, leave them with a driving need to prove their worth to others. People Pleasers are the ones with a warm smile on their face and the word prey stamped on their forehead. They are driven to capture your love by doing, overdoing, and then doing some more. They will give until there is nothing left of themselves and covertly feed off the one they are giving to in a less than healthy way. They may take the form of the love buyer, buying gifts and spending money that they don't have, in order to gain love. Their food is the adoration of others, and although they may look like they are giving, they are actually taking.

People Pleasers are always seeking the validation of others for all that they do. Unfortunately, their deep feelings of inadequacy rob them of actually hearing how important and appreciated they are to their receiver. When People Pleasers are acting from their emotional wounds, their self-sabotage comes from their inability to hear what another might truly want from them. Looking through their own filter of "How can I please you?" cuts them off from hearing, listening to, and being in touch with appropriate behavior, thereby cutting themselves off at the foot.

The shadow of People Pleasers is their deep shame that they are nothing without you. "You" is whomever they happen to be attached to at the moment, together with the deeds they are doing on "your" behalf to prove how necessary they are. Driven by feelings of uselessness and insignificance, it's the People Pleaser's challenge is to admit that they have been using the guise of giving as a way to feed their own sense of belonging and importance. By allowing themselves to feel the hidden emotions that they suppress through the act of giving, they begin to recognize how in need they are of their own charity. Once the People Pleaser surrenders to the fact that their job is not to please another, they can focus all of their attention and energy on the one person they do have the power to please: themselves.

If this mask fits you and you feel a bit angry, just take a few moments to breathe into the feelings. Allow yourself to search for and discover all the joy, energy and self-esteem that you have given away as a result of trying to please another. Make a commitment from this day forward to catch yourself when you are saying yes when you mean no and when you are giving even when you have nothing left. I assure you that you deserve better and that you will find true love, authentic love when you realize that you were born worthy and that nothing can take that away from you.

Finding Your Yellow Brick Road

I hope this finds your heart happy and your life plentiful.

In times of tumultuous change and emotional upheaval, all of us dive into the place of uncertainty, not knowing where we are going to land or what our future reality will be. We look for certainty but in the midst of heartbreaking conditions like a breakup, a divorce or even the loss of a career, we don't know where we'll end up by the time the storm blows over. Like the scene in The Wizard of Oz when Dorothy emerges from her house after the tornado, we might be asking, "Where am I?" And in the darkness of our smallest thoughts, we hear, " Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore." Shocked and feeling alone, we go on endless tailspins which keep leaving us with the same sad feelings. Dramatic change leaves us searching for solid ground and when we can't find any, the only option is to step into the sacred foundation of the Law of Acceptance.

In my book Spiritual Divorce, the first Spiritual Law of divorce and healing - The Law of Acceptance - states that everything is as it should be. Nothing occurs by accident and there are no coincidences. Breathe that in and read it over again. Everything is as it should be. Nothing occurs by accident and there are no coincidences. It goes on to say that we are always evolving whether we are aware of it or not and our lives are divinely designed for each one of us to get exactly what we need to support our own unique evolutionary process (even when we can't see it). I can promise you that this is a fact.

After years of coaching thousands of people to find the gift in their "negative" experiences, what continues to be the highest truth is this: our deepest pain leads us to our greatest purpose. When we embrace the Law of Acceptance, we open our eyes to new opportunities and new perspectives. Knowing that everything is as it should be makes the path in front of us much easier to recognize. When we are willing to get the support we need, give up the self we know, and reinvent ourselves in order to step into the next highest evolution of our soul's journey, we can, like Dorothy, have faith and follow the yellow brick road. Even though we are not in Kansas anymore we will arrive at the perfect place for our next great adventure to unfold where we will find more love, more success and more happiness than we ever imagined possible.

With love and blessings,

Debbie Ford